Hopeless
by Genis Aurion
Summary: Mild A/S slash. The Wizarding World has reason to believe Albus Potter is a murderer. Lily knows better and wants to prove his innocence. She just has to find him, first….
1. The Shocking Premise

_This story has been edited as of _**07.24.11**_. Future chapters are in progress._

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_So I'm experimenting with the world of HP chaptered fics, so pardon me if I seem out of place here. I really like writing this story, and I apologize if it's become a cliche story by now (I'm not sure). I would love to hear your opinions on this story, so please let me know what you think! I would absolutely appreciate it (aka review :p). _

_Also, I am putting warnings of violence and homosexuality on this story, though I wouldn't necessarily consider this a Slash story. Regarding the latter, this story will only contain mentionings of homosexuality, and so if that STILL bothers you then please leave now. Don't expect anything too graphic though._

_Special thanks to **Phoenix II** for coming up with the story title and summary. I hope you enjoy the chapter!  
_

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**Hopeless  
Chapter I: **_The Shocking Premise_

Lily Luna Potter was apart from the world. Hair tied tightly in a bun and dressed in pajamas, she was hunched over her desk, her brown eyes scanning the newspaper before her. Her interest in what the Wizarding world had to say overwhelmed her, but she'd hardly the courage to take in any of the words they were saying.

It was a solemn night. There was no noise in that house, though Lily was hardly surprised; her mother was surely in bed already, and if she wasn't sleeping then she'd be crying. Lily knew this from intuition; she was sure her mother refused to let anyone see her tears. Of all people, though, she had the right to cry—if only Lily had the courage to comfort her.

Before Lily was the Daily Prophet, the Wizarding paper. Her now glossy eyes scanned the headings once, twice, and even a third time—but no matter how often she read it, they alone could not convey what had happened, the emotions she'd felt….

Why had he done it?—_had _he really done it? Lily did not know, but she felt almost convinced that she was supposed to know. She'd been closest to him, after all, both at and away from school. But she'd hardly thought him to be a character of evildoing despite the rumors of the other gossiping students. And yet….

No, he couldn't have done it. He just _couldn't_ have. But it hardly changed anything.

A soft knock on the door filled her ears, and with a choked reply she bade her visitor entrance.

"James!" she exclaimed. With a running start, she buried herself within her older brother. The man before her raised an arm but hesitated, and it was only after a few moments when he'd settled with rubbing her back soothingly.

"I didn't think…" Lily began, but she did not continue that thought. She only buried her face deeper into her brother, soaking in his consolation. "H-Have you seen mum yet?"

James shook his head. "Just arrived, on my way up. How is she?"

"Terrible, just terrible. Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione have been in and out of this place though, giving her their condolences. She rarely cries, or at least in front of anyone—but she's a right mess, James, and I-I can't do anything about it." She struggled for more words, but when none came to her she withdrew herself, returning to her desk.

"Sorry I couldn't get back sooner," said James, his voice regretful. "I only got the letter this morning; if I'd gotten it earlier I'm sure I would've been able to leave sooner. But my boss wouldn't let me leave until the workday had finished… understaffed, you see."

Lily gasped. "Even knowing the circumstances? That's just… cruel, isn't it?"

James nodded quietly. "That's life… I guess. Might not agree, but…." His voice trailed off, looking around Lily's room. It was in a mess: the bed had not been made and the floor was hardly visible…. "You've been okay?"

"Me?—oh yeah, I've been okay." She turned red around the ears; Lily was never good at lying. "You?"

"Haven't had much time to think about it," James said quietly. "I'm sure I won't be getting much sleep tonight…."

"Have you read what the paper's got to say about it?" she asked suddenly, thrusting the paper to her brother's face. She was sure he'd have read it by now, especially with all the free time he had at work… _especially_ being his son. Yet she was surprised when her brother shook his head quietly, and with a heavy sigh she cleared her throat and began to read aloud.

_**Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, Lives No More**_

_On the eve of 24__th__ December, 2024, authorities confirmed the death of Harry James Potter, son of the late Lily and James Potter._

_Authorities have yet to discover the specifics upon Mr. Potter's death, but some speculation suggests the involvement of the Unforgiveable Curse, _Avada Kedavra. _Said Abigail Foster, specialist at St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries, "Mr. Potter shows no signs of bodily damage or residue from other curses known to cause harm__ [besides the Unforgiveable Curse]_. Though we are not inclined to admit that such evil has been used, it is the only reasonable cause of death we can currently assume." 

_Specialists at St. Mungo's are currently running tests for traces of poison residue in the case he may've accidentally consumed something fatal. However, Mr. Potter had been recently in the company of his wife and friends, which makes this cause of death unlikely. Still, authorities have investigated the home of Ronald and Hermione Weasley, finding nothing of dangerous threat within their home; Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, as well as Mr. Potter's wife Ginevra, were also questioned early this morning, though all three claim his death was quite unexpected._

_Authorities have also begun to wonder whether the death of Mr. Potter is tied to the disappearance of his youngest son Albus Severus Potter, who was declared missing towards the end of this past October. The reasons behind Potter's disappearance have yet to be found; however, a lack of evidence of struggle has caused a large majority of the public to assume he had left school grounds voluntarily, though by what means hardly any wizard can fathom. On these grounds, speculations have begun to arise that Potter may have—_

"—which is absolutely ridiculous!" Lily finished, not bothering to read the rest of the article. "It's just rubbish, James!—the paper's supposed to present facts to the Wizarding world, not present theories and speculations of some random no-names! People are going to start believing that Al's a… a murderer."

Lily's last words seemed to strike her hard, and even as she uttered them she felt weaker, as if a Bludger had struck her across the face. She sank into the chair behind her, setting the paper on her desk.

When James said nothing to console her, Lily placed her arms on the desk, burying her face into its cradle. "It's not fair to Al, James. Just because he's a Slytherin while the rest of us are Gryffindor—so what? It's not the first time something like this has happened before; didn't Dad say his godfather had been in Gryffindor, while the rest of his family had been Slytherin?"

"But he's Dad's son," James reasoned, "the one person no one would've thought to be a Slytherin. It's only because of Dad's—"

"Why are you taking _their_ side?" asked Lily, irritation now splayed in her voice. "That Slytherin reputation died ages ago, James!—before either of us were born! And of all people James, you're his brother! You've lived with him! Just because he's a Slytherin… of all people _you_ should know he would never…."

James said nothing, keeping his opinions to himself. Lily had always known James held his reservations, having never been a fan of having a Slytherin for a brother. He did little to prevent his brother from hearing this opinion of him, and it took Lily and her parents to stop the two from arguing over the summers. Even when Albus had gone missing, James's resent had hardly died down—but Lily had only hoped that it'd been a façade and that inside James actually did care about his disappearance.

His hatred was not founded, so Lily thought, but it wasn't uncommon either. A lot of Gryffindors looked down upon the second Potter son; some of her friends had even asked her if she ever felt ashamed for having Albus as a brother. But his association to Slytherin (which some felt led consequently to involvement with the Dark Arts) hadn't been their only reason for distaste; Albus had also become friends with a boy by the name of Scorpius Malfoy, another Slytherin. Many disliked Scorpius simply because of his father Draco, while others accused him of Albus's corruption; Lily thought neither.

"I still can't believe it," Lily said after some time, picking up the paper once more. On the back page was a collage of pictures, one of which being of her father's smiling face. She presumed it to have been taken in his younger years, as he was dressed in Quidditch robes and held a Trophy Cup proudly in one hand. There were other pictures of him; one, she noticed, was their own family picture. There was also one of her dad's own family, or so she presumed since she recognized neither the man nor the female in the picture. She saw some with Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione, and another of whom she recognized as her father's godfather from the photo albums she'd seen when she was younger. Clearly her father was well loved, and his death would surely….

"I'm gonna go see how Mum's doing," James said quietly, and with a wave he left Lily to her room. Silently cursing herself, she examined the paper once more. She hated how the paper made her father to be some sort of celebrity; sure, her father had changed the Wizarding community forever, but it hadn't been because he'd wanted fame. How would he have felt if he knew they were treating him no differently in his death?

Lily scanned some of the 'specials' within the paper. The titles of some of the articles disgusted her; _Harry Potter: Immune to the Killing Curse?_—hardly, everyone knew the thought of that was preposterous. His dad had told her himself; he'd only survived it because of his mother's love (though Lily didn't quite know what that meant, exactly), and that if any other person had tried killing him since then besides Vo… no, she couldn't even say his name anymore, now that the person who'd told her every day to not fear the name (despite his lack of existence) was now….

She shook her mind from that train of thought, desperately scanning the paper for something else to read. But the death of her father was apparently more important to the Wizarding community than everything else in existence, and almost every page was filled with commentaries and editorials regarding her father. There was even a miniature biography on him (page ten), even though she was very well aware that at least six writers were already dying to be given the chance to chronicle the life of the famous Harry Potter. But the thought of it disgusted her; did they not respect him to see that he had _died_? Could they not see his death as anything more than a business opportunity?

She still remembered the last time she'd seen her father. They'd all been at Uncle Ron's house, who'd hosted a Christmas Eve party for the entire Weasley family (and then some, including the Longbottoms and Teddy Lupin). She'd been talking to her cousin Victoire, who was indulging Lily with her experiences working at Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. As Lily was told many times before, Victoire had been interested in wizarding fashion, and the thought of one day opening her own wizards' and witches' robes store was certainly a possibility in her mind; though Lily herself didn't know what she wanted to be (despite OWL's fast approaching), the idea had sounded fun to her.

It was in the middle of this discussion when her father had tapped her shoulder lightly, and if it hadn't been for Victoire's expression changing Lily would never have known her father wanted her.

"Are you leaving?" Lily had asked her father, immediately noticing her father dressed in his traveling cloak.

Her father had nodded. "I, err… have to greet Father Christmas." Lily rolled her eyes; even if she hadn't been too old to realize that Father Christmas was a children's tale, _everyone_ knew he only came when the entire house was asleep. There was no 'greeting Father Christmas,' though Lily had supposed her father had said it knowing she wouldn't believe him anyway.

"Bye daddy," Lily had said, standing up to give her father a hug and her love. She'd hardly looked at his face as she turned back to Victoire, certain that she'd be seeing him in a few hours….

Lily cringed in her seat. She desperately wished she'd seen her father's face, now that she knew it'd be the last time she'd hear him speak to her again…. But as the thought sank within her, she began to realize that seeing her dad was the _last_ thing she wanted to see in person; it was almost as if the world was lying to her, that she refused to believe her father was actually dead, that by not seeing her father she could continue to live in this world of hers, convinced he was still alive somewhere….

Now desperate to read anything so long as it let her escape from the world, even for a moment, she settled for an article on page eleven. Sniffling slightly, she began to read silently.

_**Kingsley Shacklebolt Steps Down, Quest for Minister Begins**_

_As of late yesterday afternoon, Kingsley Shacklebolt confirmed his decision to step down as Minister for Magic. Shacklebolt refused to talk on this decision, though many believe this to be a consequent result of a claim made in June 2009, in which he argued that "…for progress and prosperity to occur power cannot reside in a single person's hands."_

_Of course, the stepping down of Shacklebolt brings about many issues, one of which being whether the position should be appointed by Shacklebolt or another individual, or if the decision should be a consensus of the wizarding community. Some have even proposed a committee be formed regarding the appointment of a new Minister for Magic. However, according to polls, a consensus similar to Muggle voting elections appeals most to the wizarding community._

_More importantly, the Ministry of Magic is more concerned with who the next Minister for Magic will be. Many wizards and witches have previously spoken that no one other than Harry Potter_—Lily cringed at this—_would perform the job perfectly, but in light of recent events, Potter will _not_ be assuming the position. Other likely candidates include Hermione Granger, who with Shacklebolt abolished pro Pureblood laws in the Wizarding Community; and Percy Weasley, who works directly under Shacklebolt and who has always had his loyalties in the affairs of the Ministry._

_Shacklebolt's shoes may be hard to follow, having completely revolutionized the Ministry of Magic since becoming Minister. His accomplishments in office include the abolishment of pro Pureblood laws, the removal of Dementors from Azkaban, the reorganization of the committees and departments within the ministry, and the reappointment of members within the Wizengamot. He is expected to serve until 5__th__ February 2025, when the appointment for Minister for Magic is made public. _

Lily's eyes read the article again, her eyes pausing at the mentioning of her father's name. _In light of recent events, Potter will not be assuming the position_—why didn't the paper just say he _died_? It wasn't like the rest of the paper hadn't already mentioned it! Yet in the midst of that train of thought Lily felt a sudden wave of respect for the author; whoever had written the article clearly had a respect for her father's death.

Looking down the page, another article caught her eye. This time she read only out of curiosity, though she already had a vague idea what it would contain.

_**Chain of Mysteries Baffles Ministry **__(an editorial)_

_Seers agree that the year 2024 has become quite the unfortunate year, the death of the celebrated Harry Potter being the worst of the tragedies this year. Though the mystery behind Potter's death has yet to be tackled, it is important not to let his death overshadow the other mysteries of this year._

_In early June, the unexplained death of Xenophilius Lovegood swarmed the papers. His death was most notable for two reasons. The first of the two had simply been for commercial reasons; with his daughter Luna Lovegood not interested in the continuation of his magazine _The Quibbler_, his business (coincidentally the Daily Prophet's largest competition) would come to its end._

_The second reason, the more important of the two, was that he'd come to an unnatural death. This only came to realization in late June, after authorities had investigated Lovegood's death. Around this time, the death of the famous wandmaker Ollivander had also begun making its way into the papers, though it wasn't until mid July when it was confirmed he had also died unnaturally._

_Before the Ministry could declare the attacks as the first in what could be a killing spree, the attacks ceased. Whether the recent death of Harry Potter is a continuation of these attacks or an attack independent of the past summer's events, no one can say for sure. In the latter case, it is possible an un-captured Death Eater might've sought revenge for Potter's actions to his or her master; however, most suspect Potter would have put enough of a fight for evidence suggesting this to be present._

_In fact, assuming the former case is more plausible. If this were so, it would also be a safe assumption to say that the source of the killings is a student, given the time of year in which the killings occurred. Most would question how a mere student could best three fine wizards much older and wiser than any student currently enrolled at Hogwarts, but this might just be the only defense presentable against this theory. All three deaths mirror the same cause: the _Avada Kedavra_ killing curse (note: students at Hogwarts are expected to have been exposed to the three Unforgivable Curses by their sixth or seventh year). _

_The Ministry has no leads on any of these three deaths, which is perhaps the biggest mystery out of all those presented. It is a widely known and shared suspicion that Albus Potter—_Lily gritted her teeth at this as she read this—_may be behind these deaths, though the Ministry has no tangible proof to act upon these suspicions. Not that they could either; on 30__th__ October of this year, the youngest son of the Potter family had gone missing from Hogwarts. Whether he was kidnapped or whether he willingly went into hiding, no evidence supports either claim. He had been known to hold a soft spot in his father's heart, thus perhaps putting the older Potter to a disadvantage; but the motive the younger Potter would have is unclear, in this situation._

(Lily skipped the next few paragraphs, not wanting to read any more. She continued reading at the last paragraph.)

_It is important to remember that the perspectives presented in this editorial are, in fact, perspectives. It should not be regarded as truth, but rather an opening for possible way of thought. But more importantly, it should be regarded as a warning to be on the lookout, especially for the rest of this winter season._

Lily had known it was coming, yet she could not help but to feel enraged. For an editorial merely written to "show perspective," the writer had been awfully accusatory, however subtle he or she tried to be. The writer barely attempted to even present other options, being quick to blame her brother….

Lily knew Albus was innocent. She had no way of proving it, but she knew he had to be; she could hardly see Albus being capable of murder, let alone three. To her, he'd always been happy, _especially_ around her and Rose.

She knew he had to have been kidnapped. His disappearance had been so sudden; if he'd planned to run away he'd have told her, Lily was sure of it—and he hadn't. And though she saw less and less of him, that'd only been due to the strain seventh years had to undergo for their NEWT's….

Besides, Scorpius hadn't disappeared, the one everyone claimed to have corrupted her brother. Even though she didn't share that view, Lily knew that if Albus had really done bad things then Scorpius would've been in on it too. But he was still at school, stressing over his own NEWT's….

Then a thought occurred to her: Had Albus dropped out?—had the stress taken the best of him? But that thought left as quickly as it'd come; she knew that if he'd dropped out he would've at the least returned home….

The possibility that Albus just might be her father's murderer was hard to accept, but Lily was forced to keep it in the back of her mind, even if she believed it to be false. In the following hours alone she'd convinced herself she'd do her part to investigate her father's death, both as her last act of appreciation to the father who loved her and as a means to avenge him. But more importantly, she also convinced herself to look into her own brother's disappearance. Not simply for the sake of finding her brother (though she did miss him dearly and wished to see him), but also to prove to herself that her brother could not _possibly_ be her father's murderer.

And it was with these thoughts of condolence and determination that finally allowed her to drift into sleep, albeit on her desk table. Though she did not know it, her newly found path would take her on a journey she just might have regretted embarking on.


	2. That Not Spoken

**Chapter II: **_That Not Spoken_

Lily awoke the next morning to a start. In the course of the night she had envisioned herself next to her now late father, who was dressed oddly in Father Christmas's red and white suit. She'd been whispering to him her apologies and grievances when a rustling occurred in the bushes nearby, and when she'd demanded their visitor reveal his or her presence none other than her brother Albus had stepped forth, wand pointed at her….

"Lily."

Lily shook her head furiously, turning to the boy now kneeling next to her.

"Lily, your mum wants you downstairs."

"Hugo…?" But the boy only nodded, standing back to his feet. He lent a hand, and with hesitance Lily took it. Then Lily asked him, curiously, "What are you doing here?"

"Mum and Dad have come to see your mum," Hugo explained, now leading his cousin out of the room. "Mum was a mess last night; I could hardly sleep with the noise she was making. Your dad and her were close, I reckon…." Lily nodded; she'd always known that her father and Rose's parents had been childhood friends while attending Hogwarts, much as she and Hugo were now.

The lights were dim in the corridor as they walked. Lily wondered silently what the current time was. It couldn't have been any earlier than seven in the morning. Why would her mum need her?

As they reached the top of the stairs, Lily's nightmares began to haunt her a second time. Her brother's face loomed in her mind, his face etched with concentration and determination—but it had only been a dream! She refused to believe it'd been real, that it could even be real…. But his wand had been at the ready, as if prepared to kill her too—

"Careful now," said Hugo, holding tighter to Lily. "Keep missing steps like this and you'll end up in a heap at the bottom."

"Prefer that to this," Lily mumbled somberly, hoping her cousin hadn't noticed. But Hugo said nothing to this, and the two continued their way downstairs. It had taken a considerably long time to reach the bottom; Lily was tired, and she was also quite weak. She had hardly left her room since that burly wizard had come to their house, hat tipped and head bowed. She had barely eaten since then too, only slices of bread forced by her mother. Her presents had yet to be opened.

When they entered the kitchen they were met with quite the crowd. Closest to them was Rose, who looked up silently at Lily as they came to a stop. Next to him sat Teddy, who seemed to be staring at the wooden kitchen table with such concentration that he might soon pull out his hair successfully. Beside him was Uncle Ron, arm wrapped nervously around a sobbing Aunt Hermione. Next to her was Lily's own mother, who seemed to be holding back her own tears; and finally beside her was James, who also seemed to be staring hard at the table.

There were two empty seats next to James, which Rose and Lily now occupied. Lily was indeed surprised why they were all gathered there, especially so early in the morning—but she could hardly think about the different reasons and possibilities. In her mind, the face of Albus Severus Potter was still dangling before her….

Uncle Ron, who appeared to be the only adult composed enough to speak, cleared his throat. "Letter from the Headmaster," he said frankly, nodding his head to the center of the wooden table. Lily's eyes followed slowly, unsurprised to see a pile of letters cluttering the table surface. His father was known to many people, and surely they were all sending his family their condolences….

Noticing her mother nodding Uncle Ron to continue, he cleared his throat once more. "Wanted to know if you all were set on coming back or if you needed time to… err, grieve…."

At this Aunt Hermione wailed loudly, Uncle Ron turning to her to comfort her.

"You don't have to return to if you don't want," Lily's mother continued. "The Headmaster seems perfectly willing to delay your return by a few more days, should you have the need."

"Not forgetting your OWL's though," added James, nodding to Lily and Hugo in turn. And then, to Rose, "and your NEWT's."

"But if they need the time…" began Lily's mother, but she quickly withdrew her gaze and said no more for the moment.

"Sorry Mum," said James. "But it… it is true, isn't it? I reckon Dad would've wanted the same; he was always yelling at me last year whenever I…."—but he did not finish, instead wrapping a comforting arm around his mother's now trembling form. This was the worst Lily had seen her mother; while she'd done her very best to keep a cool façade, she was now barely letting her children see her shaken, upset state. Not that she had had any reason to hide her grief from Lily and James, or at least thought Lily….

In the silence of the adults, Lily finally understood the reason for their meeting. On the surface, they were discussing whether they would be returning to Hogwarts on their normal schedule—but Lily knew it was much more than that. No, her mother was more interested in whether she'd be left alone….

The room remained quiet for some time. Uncle Ron had opened his mouth once to speak, but words failed him. Upon a side glance Lily found her cousins staring at the table, perhaps thinking their decisions through; Lily, too, tried to think, but she was easily distracted. Images of her dead father and her brother's murderous face were still etched clearly in her mind.

Lily began an internal mantra, as if attempting to ward off the mental images. _Al did not kill my father, Al did not kill my father, Al did not…_ but the more she said it to herself, the more her brother's face grew clearer. But she knew he _couldn't_ have killed their father; she _knew_ Al, he would never….

"I'm going back." The declaration had broken both her internal monologue and the silence that had developed around them. Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione had especially taken notice to Rose's decision, the latter having even ceased her tears.

When no one acknowledged her decision, Rose continued. "I have to. NEWT's are exhausting, and I can't afford to fall behind…."

"Your mum didn't even finish her NEWT's—though brilliant girl she was," Uncle Ron added hastily, noting the glint in his wife's eyes. "And look where she's at now! Might even be Minister for Magic, if luck's on our side."

"I don't even want it," Aunt Hermione sassed, but upon remembering the purpose of their meeting she dropped the topic instantly. "Well… if that's what you want, Rose."

"It's what I want," echoed her daughter, and it had been left at that. Lily sighed; any moment now, she would have to make her own decision….

Did she want to return? Lily knew preparation for her OWL's were awaiting her. She couldn't deny they were important; she would need them should she even consider pursuing a career after Hogwarts. Yet her urges to find her brother seemed greater at that moment, and she could not shake the unimportance of schooling that currently tempted her from returning….

But then, in order to figure out her brother's disappearance, would returning to Hogwarts become necessary?—he had disappeared there, after all. Not to mention she would need to talk to certain people at Hogwarts…. Suddenly, returning almost seemed inevitable.

But… what about her mother? Lily blinked, looking to her and finding her face gazing quietly at her. If she were to leave, who would be there to comfort her?—James could only stay with her for so long, granted his job… Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione had their own jobs to return to….

"Lily," James said quietly, and Lily turned her gaze sharply to meet her brother's. He nudged his head to the rest of the table, and it then occurred to her that everyone's gazes were now fixated upon her. She gulped nervously and found her own gaze returning to the wooden table.

"You don't have to go," Lily's mother said longingly, though Lily refused to look at her mother. Would her mother be angry with her if she returned to Hogwarts, leaving her all alone?—would her mother be more understanding if she told her why she was returning?

Lily could not decide immediately. Her mother's saddened face, her father's lifeless body, her brother's murderous expression… they were all being juggled in her head as she tried to think. Avenging his father's death, proving Albus's innocence, or being there to comfort her mother… they almost weighed equally now.

"Suppose," began Lily, focusing intently upon a portrait of her mother's parents in the distance; "suppose I return to Hogwarts."

"No one's going to judge you for what you choose," James said for his mother, and their mother nodded quietly.

"But…"—she paused—"who's going to stay with you?" There; she'd said it. Her mother's eyes widened in realization, and before Lily knew it her mother was in tears. James quickly took to her side, offering his shoulder as she cried; her tears would not cease. Lily almost thought her mother looked like a child, her flaming red hair falling before her face, mingling with the salty tears that ran down her cheeks….

In the midst of her mother's tears, Uncle Ron cleared his throat to speak. "Your aunt and I have taken leave off work," he explained, as his sister attempted to regain her composure. "James has taken off work for a week or so too, and I'm quite sure your Uncle George, Uncle Bill and Uncle Percy won't leave their sister by herself. I know your intentions are well, and I'm sure your mother appreciates it. But she won't be alone, not if we can help it. We're all grieving for Harry too, you know…." At this Aunt Hermione entered a fit of tears once more, burying her face into Ron's side.

Lily looked from her aunt and uncle, and then to her mother and her brother. She felt the need to cry—she _wanted_ to cry—but she could not; it was almost as if she'd exhausted her tears the night before. Instead she got up, and doing the only thing she could think of doing, she walked around the table to her mother, and as she closed her eyes in grief she hugged her mother.

"I'm sorry, mum," was all she could muster. Yet with the little strength within her, she could have stayed there forever.

-.-.-.-

When Lily had returned to her room, she did not leave. She'd made her decision at the table, expressing her wishes to return to Hogwarts. But once she'd made this clear, she could not stand to see her aunt and her mother in so much grief. She hardly wanted to see anyone, for that matter, and it was with this mindset that she had locked herself from the rest of the world once more.

No one had questioned her when she'd denied lunch, and she did not eat the sandwich that had been left at her door. She didn't know what Rose and Hugo were doing outside her bedroom door, but she hardly cared; she only cared about her mother, her father, her brother. Their faces played in her mind, like a broken slideshow; first her mother's sobbing face, then her dad's lifeless face, and then her brother's, poised to kill….

But her brother was _not_ a killer; Lily would simply not accept it. The mantra she'd made for herself had rung through her mind once more: _Al did not kill my father, Al did not kill my father, Al did not kill_…. And though her curiosity questioned the validity of her mantra the more she repeated it, she also felt at ease.

Without her knowing, day passed into night. She was hunched over her desk, scanning the articles in the open paper once more. She was sure today's issue would have much more to say on the topic of her father's death—if that was even at all possible. But she could almost tell that none of it would be of importance… just mindless babblings of people who had nothing else to talk about.

A knocking rang sharply through Lily's ears, but she wasn't bothered enough to answer it. Though it'd been a long day of solitude in her room, she much preferred the solitude over having to see her own emotions in other people. She'd managed not to cry, but there was no guarantee she was never going to—and if she was going to, she would certainly not do so in front of others.

But still it persisted, and only after it became too bothersome to ignore did Lily marce over to her locked door to open it.

"Hi," Hugo muttered weakly, raising a weak hand as his ears turned pink from embarrassment—a true Weasley. "Can I come in?"

Lily nodded, and she stepped aside to let her cousin in. "You know, if you were so persistent and determined to come inside, you could've just asked your sister to use _Alohomora_ on the door."

"It'd have been rude," Hugo said simply. "Besides… Rosie hasn't been in the cheeriest of moods lately."

"Really?" asked Lily, surprised. "Why?"

"I dunno really. She's lost her marbles, really… and I have the strangest feeling she's not telling me something, either." Hugo sighed, shaking the thought as he looked around her room. A fascination grew upon his face. "You know, I don't think I've been in here before."

"Hardly any boy has," Lily said quietly. Not that she still upheld the rule now; once she had started school at Hogwarts and spent less time at home, she had seemed to care less who entered her room. It was only temporary anyway; she never left anything of importance lying around as she had once done.

Hugo sat himself on Lily's bed, and though he gazed wide-eyed at Lily he made no remark. Lily met his gaze, though her mind was still preoccupied with other matters, her mantra triumphing above all her thoughts….

"You okay?" Hugo said at long last, and though it was hardly an unexpected comment Lily was thrown off guard.

"What?"

"You know," Hugo mumbled, turning pink around the ears once more. "Your dad… your brother…." Lily looked at him for several moments, unsure of what to say. Though they were her family, she still had to remind herself that she and her mom were not the only ones bothered by the death of her father and the absence of her brother….

"I'm fine," Lily said at last, though it had only been half-truth.

"We're staying over for a while," Hugo continued. "You know, to keep you and your mum company. Mum asked me to ask you if Rosie and I could sleep here; on the floor's fine. If not, your mum said we could stay in Al's…."

For a fleeting moment, Lily found the latter suggestion unappealing. What had she been expecting—to keep Albus's room open in the instance he might return home? Lily had to remind herself: Her brother might've not murdered her father, but he was still missing.

"You can stay here," Lily said at last. She half expected Hugo to thank her and leave, so that he could tell their mother—but he made no such movement.

"Mum also wanted you to know…" began Hugo, though his voice was rather shaky as he spoke. Indeed, Lily had missed the second half of his sentence entirely, and even when she asked him to repeat himself she only heard parts—but it had been enough.

"Your dad's funeral," Hugo managed. "The day before we go back."

"Oh… thanks…." Lily closed her eyes, the lifeless face of her father returning from her nightmares. How could she have forgotten something as important as a funeral?—every dead person was buried.

But would she have to see her father?

No. She simply couldn't; she refused to see her father's lifeless body. She wanted the father she loved, the father who'd kissed her goodbye days ago, the father who'd raised her since birth. She didn't want to see him lying in a tomb….

She knew she'd have to go, even if she herself was scared to. Her mother would need her, James would need her. Maybe she could refuse looking at her father; yes, that would do it. But she needed to be strong enough to at least be there for them—

But a sudden thought occurred to her, a thought that would have excited her if she hadn't been so somber. What if Albus showed up at the funeral? It was going on a limb, as though she believed him innocent much of the Wizarding world thought differently. But suppose he were innocent and hadn't killed their father—maybe he would appear?

But the idea left her as soon as it'd come, and her heart sank as the realization sank in; if he was truly innocent his disappearance wouldn't have been voluntary, meaning he couldn't just _show_ up at the funeral….

Right?

As if vaguely reading Lily's mind, Hugo asked his cousin quietly, "Have you heard anything from Al yet?"

"From Al?—no. Nor about him. I'm sure it's the last thing mum needs though, her son going missing and now…." She did not finish her sentence. Neither needed it finished.

"The Prophet say they haven't given up looking for him, you know," said Hugo, with clear hopes in assuring Lily. But she only snarled, tossing her head to the Daily Prophet still on her desk.

"_They_ also say that he murdered my dad," she said bitterly. "I reckon they're looking for him to use him as a suspect."

"Lily!" Hugo exclaimed, standing up; his face was a mix of anger and disappointment "Hey, I hardly doubt that. Not _everyone_ thinks your brother's a murderer—I, for one, don't!"

"Why's no one defending him then?" asked Lily, now rising from her chair to meet her cousin's gaze (though she was several inches shorter). "That entire paper"—here she pointed at the Daily Prophet—"has everything to do with my brother being a murderer, and _nothing_ to do with his innocence!"

Lily's breath hitched, and she turned an immediate shade of red when she realized what she was doing. She was angry at what the paper and the Wizarding community thought of her brother, the brother she knew could not have committed murder. Hugo wasn't even a part of the community that shared this belief, yet here she was, taking her anger on him—and she knew perfectly he didn't deserve it. She almost felt inclined to apologize, yet it was almost as if apologizing to him would rescind the comments she had made… and she'd meant all of them.

Deciding on an in-between, Lily had opened her mouth to speak, but Hugo had gotten there first.

"Lily… I know you're angry… but listen to me for a bit, will you? First, the Ministry has yet to make an official statement on whether Albus should truly be a suspect for your dad's… erm, yeah. The Prophet's no longer a Ministry-run paper, you know… hasn't been for quite a while. But this being said, they're looking for your brother for the sake of him being missing, _not_ to condemn him as a criminal.

"Second, have you read today's paper?—you probably haven't, being locked in here the entire day. Not that I'm saying there's anything wrong with that," he added hastily, fearful of hostility. "But apparently the Prophet received a lot of post about yesterday's issues, mostly from angry Wizarding families who don't believe the paper's taking a very fair stance on your dad's… death."

He muttered the last word quite faintly, though it had gone unnoticed from Lily's much louder response, "As they should! Biased media!—and it was supposed to be one of the better papers, too!"

"There will always be people who'll try to blame your brother," said Hugo, staring down Lily's protests. "There'll always be people who'll want to blame someone for things that can't be explained. It's the only way people cope sometimes, you know…?"

"But he's innocent…." Hugo only nodded understandingly, heaving a sigh as he struggled for the words to say. But Lily stood motionless, Hugo's words sinking into her. If the real murderer wasn't found… would people start changing their mind? Would people start thinking that her brother… _just_ might be….

Acting completely on a whim, and having realized her desperation to prove her brother's innocence, Lily told her cousin, "I'm going to find him."

"Who, Al? But you already searched the entire Hogwarts grounds Lily, and you couldn't find him any—"

"—if I try harder, if I look in all the right places…." She knew Hugo was right; upon first learning of her brother's disappearance she'd joined the teachers in searching the grounds for him—and had found nothing. But she was certain that she could now, if only she could figure out the missing pieces….

"Just remember," said Hugo after some time, the weight of her words setting in; "there are people out there who have faith in him still. You've got the Ministry, you've got Mum and Dad, you've got your mum, you've got me, and Teddy, and Rosie, and…"

But he halted there. Lily frowned, giving him a confused look, and as Hugo's brow furrowed he turned to the door.

"How long have you been standing there?" asked Hugo, and as Lily followed her cousin's gaze she found the trembling form of Rose Weasley standing before them. But there was something wrong; her face was struck with an emotion Lily could not read, and to Lily it seemed almost as if Rose had just witnessed her own father's death.

"What did you hear?" Hugo asked again, his tone now firmer—but Rose merely shook her head.

"Rosie," Hugo asked again, taking a step forward—but she'd instinctively taken one backward. "Rosie, I don't know what's going on, but you know I—"

Rose brandished her wand. Hugo stopped advancing, now growing silent as he watched his sister's pointed wand. Lily stood confused, eyes darting between her cousins. What was going on?—she desperately tried to recall what Hugo had said, but nothing she could remember would even remotely cause Rose's sudden behavior.

"Y-You… y-you can't…."

"Can't what? Rosie!"

"I-I… can't… I can't…."

"Rosie, tell me, what can't you…?"—but he'd faulted. As Hugo darted forward Rose's eyes grew wide, and in panic she slashed her wand in the air. Lily wasn't sure if she had even heard the incantation or if Rose had pulled it off nonverbally, but before her very eyes Hugo was thrown backwards—a Shield Charm, no doubt, the impact pushing Hugo back….

The two quickly ran towards the door, but there was no use; an invisible barrier now stood between them and Rose. Hugo yelled for her to remove the charm, Lily joining in as her mind was swamped with confusion as to what had just happened. But as tears rolled Rose's face she only shook her head, and with one fierce look she stormed away.


	3. Needle in the Haystack

_1, I need a beta._  
_2, I'm unearthing this project as a result of recent inspiration. I had to spend a bit of time beta'ing the first two chapters though. I meant for this chapter to include the funeral, but I got carried away. I apologize if it drags on, but there's lots of information to be revealed, so I promise it's worth your time. I won't say I'm satisfied with this chapter, but once we return to Hogwarts, things will definitely pick up._

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**Chapter III: **_Needle in the Haystack_

Over the course of the next few days, neither Lily nor Hugo saw much of Rose. She had opted to sleep in Albus's room, to where she had retreated after her encounter with her brother and cousin, but seldom did she leave his room. Lily knew this by the way the door remained shut whenever she passed it on her way downstairs. Sometimes, Lily would have Hugo accompany her, and other times Hugo would go alone—but Rose seemed insistent in keeping to herself.

"She even put a counter-charm on the door," said Lily to Hugo in hushed whispers over breakfast one morning. "Least she can say she's got her NEWT's covered."

Hugo rolled his eyes. "You tried opening her door with magic?"

"Of course not, I've still got the Trace on me. I can just tell." Lily already knew what Hugo would have thought of these methods, though. "Listen, Hugo, I think your sister knows something. She's not the kind of person to just lose control."

"Well unless you're counting her OWL examination for History of Magic," said Hugo. "My poor sister, Professor Binns won't let her live that mistake down. She should never have told him that she'd mixed the dates of—"

"—point being, she must've walked in on our conversation and heard something she didn't like!" Lily paused and looked around; she had said these last words louder than she'd intended. She caught James's eye from across the room, though he only looked at her with a weary eye before turning away.

When Hugo didn't give the reaction Lily had been seeking, she sighed in frustration. "Look, Hugo—"

"—It's not that I don't agree with you, only that I worry about my sister just as much as you worry about Al. And don't give me that look," added Hugo as Lily began to protest. "I care about Al being missing, too. But as Rosie's brother, I'm concerned first for why she's so distressed over us talking about Al, and _then_ for what she might know about Al."

"Because she knows something," Lily repeated.

Hugo nodded. "But, of course, good luck getting anything out of her, not in the state she's in now. That's why I'm more worried about Rosie right now, even with this new lead we've got. I know, you might not agree…." For a while neither spoke, and talk of Teddy's errands filled the kitchen. Lily could make out Aunt Hermione's voice from somewhere behind them, perhaps it was she with whom Teddy was speaking, but it all seemed so distant. Her mind was filled with Albus, and Rose. Albus, and Rose.

Albus…

"So you agree," Lily said, after some time. "You think Rosie reacted because we were talking about Al?"

"Well, yeah." Hugo bit his lip, eyes rolling as he began to think. "I was thinking about it the other day, and I couldn't really think of what else could've made her upset, unless she'd come up the stairs already in that state, but that wouldn't explain why she cast that shield charm to prevent us from following her."

"Unless she panicked?" offered Lily, and Hugo shrugged. "You sorta did go off on her once you realized she'd been there…."

"That too, but I think it had to have been something we'd been talking about. Besides, I'm sure we would've noticed her if she'd come upstairs already upset." Hugo frowned, almost scratching his chin, though he stopped himself short. "I know we were talking about the Prophet, but I know she doesn't give a damn about the paper. Well, she does, but she dismissed it as opinionated rubbish and didn't take in a word of it."

"Opinionated rubbish," echoed Lily, nodding. "I like it."

"The only other thing we talked about was Al," concluded Hugo. "My best bet, is that she heard us talking about wanting to find him."

"Why would she get upset over that?" But Hugo did not reply; he did not know. Nor did Lily, for that matter. Why would Rose be against finding Albus? Lily remembered, vividly, how upset Rose had been when they'd all learned Albus had gone missing. Surely, Rose would want to find him, too? Yet despite Lily's faith in her cousin, this theory seemed to fit. Her reaction, her words to them….

"You can't…" muttered Lily as Rose's words replayed in her heard. "You can't… find him?"

"It would fit," said Hugo. "But she'd also said _I can't_, didn't she? Unless I'd heard her wrong."

"I heard it too," said Lily, nodding. "Could've been panic, but… well, I don't really know what she could've meant by that one. And I'd rather not discuss the possibility of Rosie hiding Al from us, or at the very least, wanting him to stay missing."

"Agreed," said Hugo, sighing in relief. But now the two were back at square one, with nothing to go on except Rose's strange behavior towards Albus. Lily would talk to her, perhaps when they returned to Hogwarts and were settled once more. But even with that, she had so much ground to cover…

Presently, Lily was torn between entertaining two different trains of thought. On the one hand, Lily wanted to investigate Albus's disappearance, by means of asking around. Rose's behavior was too tempting of a lead to pass up the opportunity, and she knew talking to Scorpius would be an earnest investment. On the other hand, part of her just wanted to leave the house and start searching for him. She had no leads whatsoever, though, and Albus could surely be _anywhere_ in the world by now. But the longer he was missing, the more time people had to suspect him of killing…

"…you think she's just upset because of your dad?" offered Hugo, breaking their silence. "Maybe we're overthinking this. Maybe she was just taking her frustration out on us."

"Maybe," said Lily, reluctantly. Sure, she had complete faith in her cousin's intentions, and she knew Rose and Albus had been close. But to give up the only lead they'd had….

They were forced to end their discussion, however: Teddy had seated himself across from the pair, and he seemed to have an interest in conversing with them. His hot pink hair, however, spoke louder volumes than his own voice. Lily remembered Teddy explaining it to the three of them over dinner once—James, Albus, and herself—how hot pink had been his mother's favorite choice in hair color, that he wore his own hair in the same way to honor her. What shocked Lily then was not that Teddy had worn bright pink hair but rather that he had full control over changing his appearance at will, but then that was what her dad had been there for, to explain to them…

Their conversation with Teddy remained unfinished. Teddy had barely managed a hello when Lily decided she didn't want to be in the company of others, not when thoughts of her father were close to resurfacing. She apologized, albeit hurriedly, and without further warning she rose from her chair and sped to her room. It definitely had not been the first time thoughts of her father were causing her to lose control. If anything, the only thing keeping her from crying the entire time was her determination in finding Albus. But lately, namely the past few days, even this couldn't keep her from missing her father. Perhaps it was because the funeral now had a set date that was mere days away that the gravity of the situation was finally dawning upon her.

It wasn't as if Lily had been expecting to just get over losing her father, and she certainly hoped no one held her to such an expectation. She was trying. But it would take a while, much as it'd taken ages for her to get used to not passing by Al in the Great Hall before lunch after he'd disappeared. There would be plenty of times, still, where memories of her father would surface. Whether they were memories from her childhood—like the one she'd just relived—or arguments as a result of adolescent trials… her father would always be there. Because only the body dies; the soul and memories live on, and in this, the living truly never die.

Lily passed Albus's room on the way to her own room, hardly bothered enough to give the door a try for the umpteenth time. She was too immersed in thought, and as she locked herself in the comforts of her room, she wondered, briefly, if grieving would be easier if memories of the dead never resurfaced. She cursed herself for even entertaining such a thought, but not before reminding herself that, at the least, the dead would never return.

And her thoughts drifted to Albus once more. Albus, who was not dead (or so she hoped, she so sincerely hoped), but missing. Naturally, he was in a righter state than their father… Lily briefly wondered what Albus's thoughts were regarding the death of their father, and once more she pondered the optimistic possibility of Albus appearing at her father's funeral. But Lily couldn't be certain about her brother, much as she could be about her father. And the more she thought about it, the more she confirmed the necessity to find Albus, not only to prove his innocence, but also to ensure his safety, to make sure that he was at least _alive_.

Lily tiptoed over the blankets spread across her floor, Hugo's sleeping arrangement, and fell upon her bed. She heaved a sigh and allowed herself to close her eyes. She remained in this way for several moments, listening only to her erratic breathing and the distant sounds of her relatives somewhere outside her door. She really wasn't sure what she was expecting to wake up to. Perhaps it was all a dream, and perhaps upon waking she would find the endearing face of her father looking down upon her sleeping form, Albus's rare but heartwarming laughs somewhere from the corner of her room.

She opened her eyes, as if to test the theory, but was met with nothing except the ceiling overhead.

But Lily stared hard into the ceiling, as if refusing to accept the reality that had been given to her. Perhaps, if she looked hard enough, she would find Albus. But when nothing came to her, she whimpered in defeat and closed her eyes once more.

She tried to think of the last memory she'd had of Albus. He'd disappeared toward the end of October; she only remembered, besides from the countless news articles, because it'd been nearing Halloween. She remembered one morning, when he'd come to the Gryffindor table asking for Rose's whereabouts. Lily remembered Albus complaining about NEWTs, why he'd bothered to continue Transfiguration at all. She remembered accidentally running into Albus and Scorpius in the library, how they'd been arguing over something… oh, if only she could remember what they'd been arguing about!

But then a new memory surfaced, a question Albus had posed. She remembered only because she'd asked Albus countless times to leave her alone. Not because she minded his presence, for in no way was she ashamed of association with her brother, but rather because she'd had a twelve-foot essay due and she'd procrastinated. But Albus had persisted, insisting she answer his questions…

_"I told you, Al, not now."_

_"But this is important!" _Albus had protested, and it had been clear in his voice that he'd stressed this point many times already. _"You only have to answer the question, not even a minute of your time, if only you'd listen to me."_

_"Can't Rosie answer it?"_

_"Rosie wouldn't know the answer to it."_

_"Al, what could you possibly want to know that Rosie couldn't answer? You and I both know she's a genius. Better yet, go ask Malfoy! He's second best to Rosie."_

_"You realize you could've answered my question in the time it took you to say all of that." _Albus had groaned in frustration._ "Besides, Lily, I don't think anyone knows about this except our family."_

_"So ask James! I'm trying to finish something, here!"_

_"Right, because I can just owl him, because it's that easy."_

_"…isn't it?"_

_"Lily," _Albus had now become completely exasperated with his sister._ "Can't you just tell me already if you have the Invisibility Cloak?"_

_"The Invisibility Cloak?" _Lily had repeated, and Albus had nearly cried.

_"Yes, Lily, the Invisibility Cloak, it's not like I've been trying to ask you for ages, now! Do you have it?"_

"I don't." The last words were said aloud, and Lily immediately opened her eyes in realization, as if having woken from a dream. She sat up slowly, her mind still trying to process the memory that had just returned to her…

The Invisibility Cloak.

Lily wasn't quite sure why she'd only remembered the conversation now. In the two months that had passed, surely it would have come to mind? She'd remembered other conversations with her brother, most dealing with the stress he was undergoing because of NEWTs. Yet here was another lead, something she hadn't had before.

A new thought crossed her mind: Had Albus retrieved the Invisibility Cloak?

Excitement overwhelmed Lily, and she jumped from her bed and nearly bounded down the hallway. She hadn't even realized Rose had left Albus's room, not until she'd collided right into her, sending the pair to the floor and dangerously close to the stairwell.

Rose cursed, stood up and said nothing.

"Rosie!" Lily said, half in surprise. "What are you…?"

"Bathroom," her cousin muttered. "And I've gotten a bit hungry. Can't transfigure food, you know."

"Right…." But Lily was torn, torn between interrogating Rose, who had finally left the room, and finding her brother, to secure the location of their father's Invisibility Cloak. Lily's gaze darted between Rose and the stairs, she couldn't decide…

"You okay?" asked Rose, but Lily did not respond coherently. Which to pursue…?

"Is everything okay?" said a voice suddenly, and both girls turned to the bottom of the stairs, where Aunt Hermione was now standing. "I heard a noise—"

"Aunt Hermione!" exclaimed Lily, surprising everyone, even herself. But adrenaline was beginning to course through her system…. "Have you seen my brother?"

"He's missing, remember?" began Rose, while Aunt Hermione had replied with, "James? He just left with Teddy on some errands."

"He _what_?" Lily looked exasperated, confusing both Rose and Aunt Hermione. On what errands? When would he be back? She _needed_ to know the whereabouts of the cloak.

What if Albus had taken it? Had James given it to him?—but he couldn't have, Albus had been at Hogwarts, and James had been working. But if he _had_ gotten hold of it, somehow… how would anyone be able to find him?

The gravity of Lily's last thought sent her into a panic.

"He left with Teddy," Aunt Hermione reiterated. "They're on errands discussing the formalities of your father's—"

"_Where_. Is he?" asked Lily once more. Her tone was now quite terrifying, to where even Aunt Hermione had shifted uncomfortably at the foot of the stairs.

Hugo's head poked out from downstairs somewhere, and upon seeing Lily's towering figure at the top of the stairs complemented with the panicked expression upon her face, his eyes widened in fear.

"What's going on?" Hugo squeaked, but no one seemed to hear him.

"Uncle Ron!" cried Lily suddenly, eyes flashing, mind racing with other possibilities. Being her father's best mate, surely he would know…. "Where's he?"

"He's up in your mum's room," said Aunt Hermione, attempting to keep her cool. "Lily, is everything—?"

But Lily darted away before Aunt Hermione could finish. She wasn't even sure what her hurry was. Albus was already missing, the cloak wasn't in immediate danger. There was no chance of Albus taking it, now. Yet Lily was fueled on a mix of excitement, panic, worry; she was beyond rationalization, and only sought answers.

Without knocking, Lily burst into her parents' room. She was surprised to find her mother nowhere in sight, and for a split second Lily wondered where she could have gone. However, the moment she caught sight of Uncle Ron lounging on the bed, Lily became blinded once more.

"Uncle Ron!" she cried, startling her uncle in such a way that he jumped off the bed.

"Bloody hell," he said, mildly frightened. "What's going—?"

"My dad's Invisibility Cloak," Lily spat out, advancing toward the bed. "Do you know where it is?"

"The Invisibility Cloak?" echoed Uncle Ron, and Lily groaned in frustration.

"Yes, the bloody Invisibility Cloak!"—in the back of her mind, Lily noted how similarly she sounded like her brother, months ago—"Where is it?"

"I-I—" Uncle Ron gave Lily a searching look. "Blimey, I dunno, it was his to pass down, wasn't it? Least, that's what Dumbledore said, I dunno how many years ago…." Lily frowned. Something wasn't right. If Albus had been looking for the Cloak, either it had been passed down to James, or…

"Do you think my dad passed it down at all?" Lily proposed, praying that Uncle Ron gave her the answer she wanted to hear. But if it had never been passed down, then surely it would be right here in the very room they were standing it, tucked away somewhere….

But Uncle Ron only shook his head, baffled. "I told you, Lily, I dunno where it is." He gave Lily one last apologetic look before Lily sighed, exiting the room. She ignored his calls for her to return, to explain what had just happened. She passed and completely ignored Aunt Hermione in the hall, who attempted to use strictness to get Lily to explain her erratic behavior. It was only Rose, however, who succeeded in getting Lily's attention at all, and only by clasping the girl's wrist and dragging Lily into Albus's room.

"What're you…?" began Lily, half in surprise, but Rose did not answer her, moving to lock the door.

"No one's going to interrupt us, it's charmed. Though I hear you're already familiar with it." Lily looked at Rose, confused. Did she… did Rose know the cloak's whereabouts? Or was she finally giving in to her efforts in finding Albus?

Lily took a moment to look around the room. Even for her, it'd been a while since he'd entered the room. She barely recognized the walls, which were now covered with posters of famous Quidditch players, who were busy zooming around on broomsticks. The desk was cluttered with photographs, and from her distance she could barely make out one of Albus, Rose, and Scorpius. But besides these details, as well as the blankets on which Rose had been sleeping, the room was noticeably empty; then again, Albus had gone missing while at Hogwarts.

"Do you trust me?" The question had been so unexpected that Lily didn't know what to say. But before she could even answer, Rose continued. "Lily, if you care about Al, you have to trust me."

"I do," Lily said, and in fairness, she hadn't been lying. "Do you know something? Won't you tell me?"

And once more, Rose turned away.

"I can't," she said, biting her lip. "I can't… I can't say."

"Why _not_?" Lily cried. "Do you not care about—?"

"Of _course_ I bloody care!" retorted Rose, and with such fierceness that Lily backed away from her. "And that's precisely why you _can't_ go looking for him, or he'll be in danger!"

"Rose, I don't—"

"You don't have to understand," interjected Rose. Lily studied her cousin's face thoroughly. Her eyes were moist, perhaps from having recently cried, but she also seemed exhausted. Her face drooped, as if having lacked sleep, yet it also reminded Lily of burden. And quite honestly, it confused Lily, to hear Rose plead for trust, yet to hear her telling Lily to _not_ look for Albus. So many thoughts were racing Lily's mind, but she couldn't seem to piece any of them together.

When Lily said nothing, Rose forced herself to continue. "I'm going to shake mum and dad off your trail. Dad's probably told mum by now what you were after, but I'll think of something. I'll have to send a Patronus to James warning him of what happened."

"Does James—"

"No, he doesn't know anything about where Al is. Nor do I, really."

"How do I know you're not lying?"

"You don't." Rose frowned apologetically. "Trust me when I say that it's for his safety, and yours. Al told me that no one could go looking for him… I'm sorry, Lily."

Lily wasn't sure what to think, so she said nothing on the matter. Her mind was racing too fast from all of the new information she'd received; she couldn't process anything. She did feel a mix of anger and relief. Even if Rose couldn't divulge anything, she'd at least assured her that Albus was safe.

"Lily," pleaded Rose, "Lily, please promise me you won't go looking for your brother. It sucks, it hurts, I know, but… trust me? Trust your brother?"

But Lily wasn't listening, her mind was still racing. How, then, could she help clear Albus's name, if he didn't want to be found? Why had Albus even gone into hiding? And most importantly, even if Lily went against her brother's wishes…

"Al has the cloak," Lily muttered, slowly, as if reluctant to admitting the truth. She should have realized it earlier, when Rose had talked about thwarting her parents' suspicions, about warning James… but it had only hit Lily now.

Rose closed her eyes and sighed. "Lily, I don't kn—"

"—Rose, Al has the Invisibility Cloak, doesn't he?"

Rose's nod had been slight, but it'd spoken volumes: How would Lily ever be able to find her brother, now?


	4. Daddy's Little Girl

_1, I only cover the wake and not the funeral itself. The funeral here follows immediately after the wake, but to avoid redundancy (and because I'm not sure I'd do it justice) the chapter ends before the funeral, and the next chapter will continue from Hogwarts._

_2, still need a beta._

_3. happy 31st birthday, Harry Potter! :) _

* * *

**Chapter IV: **_Daddy's Little Girl_

With Rose's permission, Lily relayed to Hugo the information she'd learned from her cousin. He'd reacted in the way she'd expected him to: Hugo was at a loss of words, and unsure of what to say or what to do.

"He could be anywhere, though!" the boy exclaimed after some time, though this much was obvious. "All we know, he could even be in this room with us!" Lily only nodded to this. She suspected, however, that her brother was not with them. Rose's words had convinced her of this. Rose had been under the impression that Albus was in danger, it seemed. Knowing her brother, Lily figured he was either hiding abroad, or busy trying to resolve whatever it was that had Albus in danger.

If only Lily knew why he'd gone into hiding, or at least where he'd be hiding. And if Albus was truly in danger, why hadn't he told anyone? The Ministry was full of qualified Aurors who could protect him. And hadn't he been at Hogwarts, said to be the one of the safest places a wizard could be? Where was the need to hide? And why hadn't he at least confided in one of the professors or the headmaster? Why not their own father, even? Surely their father could've—

Unless… but no, Albus couldn't have told their father. Letters Lily's parents had sent her clearly showed that Albus's disappearance had come as a shock. But it would have fit; perhaps Albus had confided in their father, and perhaps it had cost him his life. Perhaps that was why Rose was so adamant in keeping Lily out of his business.

But their father couldn't have known, Lily convinced herself, so she let go of the thought.

"But the more important question," said Hugo, who seemed to have properly composed himself, "is if you're going to look for him, anyway."

Lily said nothing. She'd had many reasons for finding her brother, some more obvious than others. Until recently, he'd been thought of as missing, and part of her drive in finding him was her duty, as Albus's sister, to make sure her family was safe. Now, she knew he'd disappeared voluntarily—or, at least, Rose had given her that impression—so finding Albus had become a matter of obeying her brother's wishes. But Lily had to remind herself, part of finding her brother was to prove his innocence, to investigate the cause of her father's death. The only reason she hadn't spent much effort yet on finding the cause of her father's death was because it still hit too close, too hard.

If only there were some way for Albus to prove his innocence without giving him away. Not that there was anything yet that explicitly made Albus innocent, though Lily was sure of his innocence, either way. In the same way, nothing suggested Albus had to be guilty, but so long as this stalemate existed Lily knew people were going to talk.

The path to take, then, was clear.

"At the least, we need to figure out why he disappeared," said Lily, opening to Hugo a window into her conscience. "If we can find a way of proving that Albus's disappearance is completely unrelated to my father, all the better. And if it ends up that Albus really is in considerable danger…."

"…we'll find him," Hugo finished, and Lily nodded quietly.

"Or tell someone who can help him. Rosie will hate us, but he shouldn't suffer alone."

Lily sighed, the metallic taste of irony strong in her mouth. As if finding Albus would be an appropriate response. It wasn't like he was hiding under the world's most perfect Invisibility Cloak or anything. But Lily kept these bitter thoughts to herself, not wanting to spoil Hugo's optimism, or at the least his resolve.

The next few days passed more quickly, though only in relative comparison, and before Lily knew it, her father's funeral had approached. She'd busied herself with chores around the house, cleaning up rooms (without magic, of course) and rearranging furniture to maximize space—and all of these chores, coupled with Rose and Hugo's company, had helped the time fly. On the eve of the wake, the three were joined with almost all of their cousins, and though they were gathered for somber purposes, the company made the air slightly more cheerful.

Because of the sheer number of Weasleys (and Teddy) in the house, Lily saw the room assignments rearranged. Teddy roomed with James, an arrangement Mr Harry Potter had only begun to allow in his last few years, and joining them was Uncle Charlie. Lily gave up her own room to accommodate Uncle George and his family, moving down the hall to Albus's, where she was joined by Hugo, Rose, Molly and Lucy, and Victoire, Dominique, and Louis. (The rest of the arrangements were as follows: Molly and Arthur Weasley, in the guest room; Uncle Percy and Aunt Audrey, in the living room, and Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione, with Lily's mother; Uncle Bill and Auntie Fleur were not present, having only sent their children.)

Though the Weasley cousins were on cramped quarters, none complained. Lily's father was not mentioned, a sort of unspoken taboo, and it was implied he was the subject of everyone's thoughts, anyway. Albus surfaced into conversation only once, towards the birth of the night, when they'd noted whose room they'd occupied. Admittedly, Lily had fought with her mother to stay in Albus's room; the initial proposal would have seen the inhabitants of her room and Albus's swapped. Her mother only gave in when Rose entered the argument, claiming attachment to the room, but both girls knew they were more concerned with keeping Albus's skeletons in his room of a closet. Still, just in case, Lily kept an ear open for opening doors that shouldn't be opening on their own, in the rare case that her brother would be joining them.

The mood was light. Hugo and Louis managed to distance themselves from their female cousins, establishing a corner to themselves. In the center of the room sat the six others, with Lily's back to the door, and in turn they updated each other on their lives since their last gathering, mere weeks ago. Victoire, who was currently employed under Madam Malkin, had apparently taken into consideration the idea of starting her own Wizarding fashion line, in which trendy muggle styles would be adapted to satisfy the everyday needs of young wizards and witches.

Molly and Lucy talked of boys; apparently, Conan Finnigan had broken up with Molly with the (overly optimistic) hopes of dating Lucy. Meanwhile, Lucy's boyfriend—Lily hadn't caught the name, but she knew him to be from Ravenclaw—had confessed to being gay, having only gone out with Lucy as a cover up.

"I don't even care that he's gay," Lucy went on to say, rolling her eyes with such exaggeration that left Lily slightly miffed. "I just can't believe he had the _nerve_!"

Dominique had more of a story to tell, having not been at the Weasley Christmas Eve party. Unlike the other Weasley children, Dominique was attending Beauxbatons. She'd coaxed her father to send her there after her unyielding passion for French; her mother, having been alumni, was all for her decision. It was for the better, it seemed, because Dominique always came home with the most interesting stories and experiences to share, and they were never quite like anything the other Weasleys were familiar with.

"Though I still dunno if I'd fancy a French boy before a nice English one," Dominique said with a laugh, receiving an _Amen!_ from Victoire, whose eyes were still set on Teddy Lupin. Then eyes turned to Rose and Lily, both of whom not having much to share.

"We can't all live lives like Molly and Lucy," Rose said, jokingly, and the former feigned insult.

"But what about that Gryffindor boy?" asked Molly, and though she didn't mention him by name, Lily knew exactly which boy she had in mind.

"Or Malfoy, even, Al's friend. He's kinda cute," added Lucy.

Rose laughed. "'_That Gryffindor boy_,' as you say, so happens to think I'm asexual. That, or he's under the impression I'm engaged to my studies."

"Which is somewhat true," said Lily, which earned her a light punch to the shoulder.

"As for Scorpius…." Rose sighed, and in turn many of the room's occupants entered a fit of giggles.

"Ooh, first name basis, Rosie?" teased Lucy. "I knew it, you _do_ like Malfoy!"

"They're all just good friends," defended Lily. "Her and Al and Scorpius. He's been a family friend since he went to Switzerland with us for summer vacation." Lily caught Rose's fleeting moment of gratitude from the corner of her eye, though it passed quickly.

"So no Malfoys entering our family tree?" Molly asked one last time, and Rose shrugged and shook her head. They were left with that disappointment, for they were interrupted by the sound of absolute destruction; Hugo's queen had decided to give Louis's rook quite the punishment in their game of Wizarding chess.

"Bloody dominatrix!" Louis yelled, accent surfacing, and the room filled with laughter. At that point, however, Uncle George popped his head in the doorway, requesting that they go to bed; their noise, it seemed, had woken up Fred.

With the click of a Deluminator, a treasure Hugo had received from his father, the lights were out. Lily did not succumb to sleep, not easily, and she was sure she'd listened to Lucy's and Molly's snores fill the room for hours before her conscience finally gave way. At the least, it comforted Lily knowing that she hadn't been the only one with problems sleeping; next to her, she could feel Rose tossing restlessly.

Lily dreamed many things that night. She first saw herself revisiting an old memory, though she was aware enough to not trust the accuracy of her recollection. She'd just finished saying goodbye to her parents and James, and was now making her way through the hallway aboard the Hogwarts Express. She was accompanied by Albus, Rose, Hugo and Scorpius, and the five of them were trying to find a compartment to themselves.

"There's one at the end here, I think!" said Albus, and the four followed after him. They hurriedly seated themselves and shut the door, not wanting to deal with the chaos from the other students running up and down the train's length. Rose and Scorpius were both skinny enough to fit Albus on their side, while Lily and Hugo stretched themselves upon the seats on the other.

"Oh, don't be like that!" Hugo exclaimed suddenly, and all eyes turned first to him, and then to Rose. Rose, it seemed, had a panicked look upon her face.

"What?" said Rose defensively. "I'm just worried about taking NEWTs this year, is there anything wrong with that?"

"You'll be fine, though! I honestly don't think they'd make you take NEWTs without adequate preparation." Rose opened her mouth to protest, but not before Albus and Scorpius each gave their share of laughs; Lily had merely rolled her eyes.

"This sounds strangely familiar," said Albus, turning to Scorpius and nudging his side. "How did it go, Scor? _Oh my god, OWLs are so stressful, what if I fail? Haha, just kidding, I got outstanding on all my OWLs!_"

"Not true!" sassed Rose. "I only got an Exceeds Expecations in History of Magic."

Albus guffawed.

"Pretty much beats your mom, doesn't it?" said Lily, as politely as she could manage, but Rose did not spare her from her wrath.

The conversation continued in this way for some time. Scorpius had cleverly shifted the focus by giving Lily and Hugo tips for their own OWLs; indeed, it took only minutes before Rose cooled off and began pitching in her own advice. Then they began planning their first Hogsmeade visit for the school year, though Rose soon got bored of this topic. She fell asleep on Albus's shoulder, who not long after fell asleep on Scorpius's shoulder.

Something changed, though. Without warning, the lights in the cabin went out. Shrieks could be heard across the train, and coupled with Scorpius's sudden leap into the air, both Weasleys awoke from their slumbers.

"Whasgonon?" Albus mumbled weakly, though no one heard him.

"Quick, Hugo!" came Rose's voice. "Your Deluminator!"

"It puts out lights, it doesn't turn them on!" But strangely enough, though the lights were out, Lily could still see perfectly fine. She wasn't sure if this was the case for the others, however, not with Rose panicking and Albus waving his arms blindly. She looked around the room, confused; the train still seemed to be moving, though it was almost as if the day had passed into night in an instant.

She looked first to Hugo, who was busy fumbling with his pockets for the Deluminator, perhaps just to prove a point. Then she looked to Scorpius, who seemed to be looking for Albus's… arm…?

"This way," she heard Scorpius whisper to Albus, amazingly, especially amid all the shrieking from students on the train. She watched, at first, as Scorpius found Albus's wrist in the dark. She watched as he pulled him to his feet and led him out the compartment…. And then, instinctively, she reached into her pocket and withdrew the Cloak of Invisibility, throwing it over herself before following them…

When she left the compartment she was met not with the Hogwarts Express, but what she figured to be the Slytherin boys' dormitory. She couldn't be sure, she'd never been in, but from the faint green glow in the room, it was a safe assumption. Stepping closer, she noticed Albus and Scorpius already seated on a bed, though their backs were turned to her.

Lily approached the couple, remaining at a safe distance, and listened:

"…not going to like you when you tell her," Scorpius was saying. From her perspective, he appeared to be staring hard at his feet. "Besides, Al, I don't think you could pull it off."

"Nice to see you have faith in me," said Albus, distastefully. "Besides, you heard what that guy at the Hog's Head said. It's the only way."

"You don't know that!" cried Scorpius, and Lily could almost hear the desperation in his voice. "You don't… why not tell the headmaster?"

"It has to be me." Scorpius raised his head to protest again, but no retort came from his mouth. Lily strained her head, trying to get a glance at Scorpius's face—and then it hit her, she was under a bloody Invisibility Cloak, she could go wherever she pleased and not be seen. So she walked around the two and stood directly before them, but she was forced to clasp a hand over her mouth to keep her from gasping audibly.

Scorpius was crying.

"Al…."

"Don't tell Rosie," said Albus, frowning at the sight of Scorpius's tears. "Well, don't tell her why. She can't know… no one can."

"And you expect me to just… sit here? Watch you disappear from my life entirely?"

"Would you rather see me dead?" challenged Albus, rising from his seat. Scorpius stared, merely stared, and for a while their eyes did all the talking. Then, shaking visibly, Scorpius rose from the bed, raised a hand, and slapped Albus across the cheek.

Lily was sure she'd gasped then. But, strangely enough, neither boy heard her.

"You _idiot_," Scorpius hissed.

Then, unexpectedly, Scorpius kissed Albus. And Lily had _definitely_ gasped then. She watched only for a brief moment: Within seconds, Albus pushed him away.

"Scor…" Albus muttered weakly, wiping his mouth. Scorpius looked devastated but said nothing, turning away. "You… you should go find Rosie, now."

"Y-Yeah." Lily felt sorry for Scorpius as he quickly hurried away. She wanted to follow him, almost, to make sure he was okay. But something told her to stay with Albus, so she did—and not long after the scene changed, their familiar house materializing before them, snow covering the ground—

And there stood their father, and Lily almost wanted to cry at the sight of him. If only she weren't under an Invisibility Cloak, if only his face weren't so serious while talking to Albus, she'd leap into his arms and hug him, to make sure he really did know that she loved and appreciated him, that she'd always be her daddy's little girl…

But Harry had just taken out his wand, pulling Lily right out of her thoughts. He seemed alarmed, but not panicked.

"It has to be you," said Harry, and Albus nodded before raising his wand. Lily knew what would be next, nor did she want it to happen. Albus couldn't have murdered her father, she wouldn't allow it even in a dream. Yet nothing seemed to be stopping Albus, with his wand already raised and his mouth open, uttering—

"_Lily, wake up_!"

Lily blinked. Seven faces were peering down at her. She felt slightly damp.

She'd almost forgotten it'd all been just a dream.

-.-.-.-

Lily had woken up all of her cousins. She felt guilty, even though they insisted everything was fine. But though it was still early, Lily knew she wouldn't be getting to bed no matter hard she tried.

Today was the day. There was certainly something solemn in the atmosphere. Perhaps it had always been there, and that today specifically it simply would not be suppressed. In either case, emotions were running wildly, wounds torn open anew.

Today, Lily would have to face her father.

The thought scared her. She didn't mean to dishonor him, however. But seeing him with her own eyes, instead of reading news articles or hearing spoken word… there was a sharp finality to it. Perhaps it would drive her to giving her father the justice he deserved. Perhaps Lily would be frightened, though what Gryffindor would she be, then?

So she tried hard not to think about it. Distractions only went so far, especially when overused, but so long as they worked, Lily would take them. So she allowed herself to lapse into schemes of finding her brother, and if it could be considered some form of measurement, the thoughts had helped her stomach her breakfast.

Lily wondered how much of her dream had been truth, if anything at all. Well, first she wondered if it was normal to dream about her brother's romantic affairs with his best friend, though in Albus's defense, Scorpius's passion appeared to be one-sided. What had _that_ been about, anyway?

Lily's body was running on autopilot. She instead concerned herself with trying to logically validate her dreams. It was unreliable to take any of it as truth, so rather Lily thought of them as potential ideas and starting points. She knew the dream had been triggered from her own hypotheses, however. So what Lily took seriously were things like how Albus (and perhaps Scorpius) had come across knowing they were in danger, if Albus had really told Scorpius things he hadn't told Rose… things that seemed to justify the need to talk to Scorpius. She wasn't sure how she'd make him talk, and Lily was sure Rose would have already tried. But she would find a way….

"Lily?"

Lily blinked, shaking her head, turning her head to her mother's voice.

"Yes, mother?"

"I was just asking if you were ready."

"Yes, mother!" Lily attempted a smile, but she was sure it'd come across as a twisted frown. Nevertheless, she wrapped her arm around her mother's waist, in an attempt to comfort her, and together the two made toward the rest of the Weasleys at the front door.

Several portkeys later, the Weasley's found themselves at Godric's Hollow. It had the same feel as it always did, not counting the solemnity that blanketed them. The streets were slightly more bustling than its residents were used to, having seen many wizards come and go that morning alone. Even as they made their way down the road, Lily couldn't help but to admire the number of wizards and witches that passed, giving her mother their condolences and grievances. It was a sudden realization, though she'd always known, just how well-respected and loved her father had been.

Lily lapsed into autopilot once more, then. She vaguely noted her grandparents taking off, everyone following them save James and Teddy, who took to her sides and helped her down the road. She noted a gathering of people a little off the road, where she presumed her father's coffin lay…. If Lily recalled correctly, if she could recall anything at all, her mother had said something about her father being buried near his parents, so that they could be reunited once more…

The air was thick, now. She could hear sniffling, sobs. People were talking, voices laden with sorrow. She could make out Aunt Hermione's soothing voice, occasionally interrupted with her own sniffling. James's grip on her shoulder tightened. She wasn't sure if he he'd been trying to console her or because he'd seen something that put him on edge. But she wasn't really paying attention, either, emotions coursing through her, having lost control long ago. And then Teddy had stepped forward, turning to her, beckoning her to look at her father.

"It's up to you," said James quietly. Lily turned to him, and the two looked at each other briefly.

Lily stepped forward. For a fraction of a second Lily had almost expected to see her father dressed as Father Christmas, though she wasn't really sure why. But the moment passed, and she was now staring at the face of her father. He hardly seemed like the man of her dreams, and for a moment Lily wondered how many times she'd ever seen her father sleep. That's what it looked like, staring upon Harry's face: Lily felt as if she was merely watching her father sleep.

His eyes were closed, and he seemed at peace. For all Lily knew someone could've made him that way, but Lily was more content in believing her father had died peacefully. She would get to the bottom of it, for sure.

It was only once her conscience kicked in that emotions got the best of her. Only after staring at her father for moments did she begin to think. The last time they'd talked. The last time she'd told him she loved him. The last time they'd fought. The last time she'd seen him smile. The last time she'd felt safe in his embrace. The last time she'd reminded him she was his favorite daughter. The last time… and like a tidal wave they passed through her, leaving her soaked, but of her own tears. Because, truly, there was no going back to those memories, even if the idea of memories was that they were of the past and not to be lived through again. Seeing him lying there affirmed this. She could beg as much as she wanted, but she knew he would not wake.

What had his last words to Al been? What had he told his wife before leaving that house?

No. _No_.

Lily willed herself to prevent her thoughts from continuing. She couldn't, shouldn't…

…but maybe she needed the moment to completely let go. Maybe, to let it out now, so that she could focus completely on her tasks later. After all, was that not the idea of a funeral? To honor the dead, but more importantly… to come to terms with yourself?

Perhaps in this reluctance, Lily was like her mother. But that morning, she would allow it. Stepping back from the coffin, she bit her lip, turned to James, buried herself in his shoulders, and came undone.


End file.
